February 28, 2009

Day 39 - Went to Dustin's sister's (Melissa) concert last night and it was very nice. Before the concert we went in so she could practice her instruments but by that point the day had caught up with her and she was frustrated when she couldn't practice as long before getting winded and pain trying to creep in. Caitlin did enjoyed seeing people again after a very long time and Melissa sang very nicely. Today we have had a crazy day with the snowfall that landed and other obstacles cancelling previous plans. So we are having a early dinner and town and then off to a movie before Caitlin goes to help with a friends middle school birthday party.

February 27, 2009 - Happy Birthday Grandma Martha

Almost all of the Kinman Girls: Pat, Afton, Caitlin, Whitney, Grandma Martha, Carma (unfortunately Jill was unable to be there - Texas is great but so far away)

Day 38 - Happy Birthday Grandma Martha. Caitlin and Mark ventured down the hill to deliver birthday wishes to his mom before she took off for the day. The hospital called later that morning to schedule more tests that will hopefully help decode more of the mystery. Caitlin spent the remainder of the day working on the stationary bike and packing before her fatique wore out for a part of the afternoon. She is hoping to feel well enough to go into Dustin's sister's senior recital this evening. Life feels like a series of small steps but the majority of them are headed in the right direction!!!!

February 26, 2009

Day 37 - Yummy! Caitlin fixed dinner tonight for Mark and I and it was delicious. She also worked out sporadically on Sandi's stationary bike trying to build up more stamina. Fatique and soreness finally won out and she was worn out by seven and headed off to bed but hopes to get more done tomorrow. Overall a fairly good day.

February 25, 2009

Day 36 - The last two days have rolled into one it feels like to me. Headed to a specialist in KC today who was very nice and seems to be very in tune to things. She gave Caitlin and I a lot of insight as to what is going on and all the pros and cons to what has been found. We walked away with a lot of good information to think over. Stopped to see her photographer. Teri is amazing and I know she will be in very protective hands on the day of the wedding. It is great to have a photographer who cares so much. Also stopped to see my dad who was doing great. He gave Caitlin some of my mom's hats that look adorable on her. We visited about the wedding plans a bit before heading north. All in all a very productive day.

February 24, 2009

Day 35 - Yesterday went fairly well once Caitlin's blood pressure calmed down. It started out really low at 7:00 a.m. (82/63, 77) and stayed low throughout the day but then today it has jumped to the higher side today at 7:00 a.m. (118/94, 110) which baffles me but she seems to be perkier. While still sore I see more and more of her each day, last night while working with her dance girls she actually went down into the splits. And got frustrated that she couldn't go into town to practice because we were awaiting a phone call from the doctor. As usual by nights end she was spent and crashed early but I feel like we are seeing more spurts of normal as each day progresses. Now if we can get her heart mystery resolved but they are working on that and we continue to pray the pieces will fall together.

February 23, 2009

Day 34 - Caitlin's day was busy yesterday with a visit from a college friend then off to try to practice. After repeated efforts she cut practice short due to dizziness, breathing and the beginnings of a migraine. Once home and napped she did improve a bit but headed to bed early. Sleep is the best thing at the moment for her between her activities. It is fun to watch her personality starting to come back out.

February 22, 2009

Day 33 - Caitlin had a good day yesterday. Got a lot accomplished between naps including practicing her music, going to Walmart, Rods, church and spending the evening with the Heneggler trio not to mention visits with Dustin throughout the day. She also headed north with her dad and I to take flowers to Darlene, one of her guardian angels the day of the accident. A very productive but exhausting day. It is nice to see her activity level start to increase in spite of it creating long restless nights.

February 21, 2009

Caitlin is pictured displaying the teapot Aunt Libby sent to Dustin and Caitlin. They were thrilled to get a blue and white teapot. It is beautiful.

Day 32 - Caitlin and Dustin received some wedding gifts this week. So this morning they webcammed and opened wedding gifts. It was fun to watch technology in action and watch them open gifts together 1400 miles apart. Caitlin's test went well yesterday as far as we can tell. We won't know the results until the first of the week but Caitlin's body handled it well and she is recovering nicely from it (sleeping a lot).

February 20, 2009

Caitlin slept peacefully through most of the day after her procedure/test for her heart done today.

Day 31 - Caitlin had a more typical day yesterday with good periods and bad periods throughout the day. It seemed like she was having more good periods than bad (yeah!). She webcammed with Dustin lastnight and it was fun to see her glow and hear her giggles again. Her tummy gave her fits along with her ribs but she hung tough through it. We go today for an outpatient procedure/test to see if they can get a more definitive picture of what is going on. We pray that these upcoming tests will reveal what it is they need to see to get a solid gameplan in place. Good news yesterday was the possibility of maybe having found a car. We did test drive it and will see how this possibility unfolds itself.

February 19, 2009

The Kinman Girls - Pat, Afton, Caitlin, Whitney, Martha, Carma

Day 30 - Yesterday found Caitlin feeling better than Tuesday. I think a day in bed sleeping certainly helped. She is still frail but is working hard to gain strength. Now if she can just figure out how to pace herself. We met with her DJ for the wedding and got the music ironed out. We are totally confident her wedding dance will be just what she has always dreamed about. By the time we got home my fatique was showing and by early this morning I was taking migraine medicine in hopes it would conquer my migraine in time for school. Unfortunately my best efforts were in vain until just before eleven o'clock this morning when I started seeing relief so both of us are having a quiet day other than her doctor's appointment this afternoon. It is nice to have occassions to write about the more 'normal' events of life. We are gaining in this journey!

February 18, 2009

Day 29 - Four weeks ago today our world turned upside down. What should have been a relaxing day of getting to feel better (I was home sick that day) and being pampered with the Sprite Caitlin had gone after that morning turned into a rollercoaster ride in the blink of an eye. On the positive side we are on a rollercoaster and lots of discoveries have been made as a result that otherwise probably would not have been made. First and foremost is to love one another and to deal with what is and realize the future is a promising thing. While there have been disappointments like not getting to fly yet and the chronic battle with fatique there have also been lots of bright spots. Her doctor called yesterday wanting more tests to develop a clearer picture of the game plan. He is ordering a transesophageal echocardiogram as well as a another look at her neurology. Small steps to continue helping to unfold the mysterious pieces of this puzzle. She was totally exhausted yesterday and we have not seen her that exhausted in a long time but by evenings end Caitlin was beginning to rally for a short bit. Her spirits are good and she lights up when Dustin calls.

February 17, 2009

Day 28 - Caitlin had a cardiac stress test and echo-cardiogram yesterday. It went so much better than the first test they did last week. The staff was amazing and very patient working with her and her recovery process. The tests confirmed what we already knew about her heart so now we wait and see what the recommendations are. Caitlin is frustrated in not healing as fast as she would like to. Her previous set backs she bounced out of so fast she (and us) just assumed her personality and determination would reap the same speedy results. Unfortunately with the magnitude of all of this we have had to come to the realization that we need to be patience (apparently she is not the only one who lost their patience button). As frustrating as it is we will be patient and remain grateful that we have been given the chance to be patient even when it is not convenient for us. In retrospect she has gained an amazing amount of ground from where she started and continues to push forward.

February 16, 2009 - Happy Birthday Jill

Happy Birthday Jill!!!!!!!!! Hope my son spoiled you rotten. Pictured above is my beautiful newest daughter on her wedding day!

Day 27 - Today is my daughter's (technically daughter in laws) birthday. I hope she has a wonderful day. Caitlin has a test early today in Kansas City and then we will see what the day brings. She was so worn out yesterday that she was in bed before 7:30 last night. Was able to introduce Dustin's mom, Taresa, to Father Martin yesterday when I was showing her the sanctuary. Father Martin will be marrying Caitlin and Dustin and himself has been recovering from being ill but as usual was in great spirits.

February 15, 2009

Day 26 - Today was an eventful day starting with a great breakfast of homemade Monkey Bread, although we did find out it is possible to melt a bundt pan. Caitlin made it to her household bridal shower today by Aunt Carma, Whitney and Afton. It was amazing. Carma and the girls are amazing in themselves and wonderful hostesses as well. Several of Caitlin's close friends came and people she adores. Dustin's mother made it up from Pleasant Hill along with his sister. The shower was wonderful and Caitlin and Dustin received many nice things. The day was fantastic but by suppertime Caitlin was exhausted and all other thoughts and hopes for the day would have to wait a day or two as she headed to bed. The mind is willing and ready and just waiting for her body to catch up to her. It will in time but its back to that patience button they forgot to put back in during her surgery.

February 14, 2009 - Happy Valentine's Everyone

Caitlin talked to a college recruiter from Arizona yesterday. They talked about her love of music, her dancing, and her goals for the future regarding her education and plans with Dustin.

Day 25 - Happy Valentine's Day everyone. Amazing how time goes by quickly. Caitlin is returning more to herself each day. She still tires easily and deals with the pain that goes with the accident but that is such a small price to pay for having her here to celebrate with. She called Ellen yesterday and thanks to Ellen's time and an amazing hair salon (thanks Chris and Heather) who worked her in she enjoyed a girlie afternoon. She looks adorable and is in high hopes of her "do" surviving until the end of the weekend. So far so good. It is amazing what a trip to the salon can do for a girl. She came home after and totally crashed on the floor. The dogs jumped over her, licked her, pulled on her scarf, and numerous other dog tricks designed to get attention and my daughter layed there and didn't flinch until one of the dogs walked over her tummy and she sat straight up. Have plans today to have dinner with the family and then on to a quiet evening. She has already talked to Dustin and she just glowed. It was nice to see that glow coming back in her as well.

February 13, 2009

Day 24 - Took Caitlin yesterday for one of her cardiac tests only to have her get part way through it and have them discontinue it. Apparently it was too painful for her around her surgical site and abdomin and though she told them about her recent trama and they looked at the incision no one thought it would prevent finishing the test but it did. So we headed home with Caitlin in pain and both of us frustrated. Hopefully they got enough info from what she did get done to tell us something but only time will tell. Long day for both of us but the sun was out and no snow storm yet which was nice.

February 12, 2009

Day 23 - I headed off to work yesterday for the first time in three weeks. Anxious to see my students but felt a bit like a fish out of water and at times overwhelmed to be able to work where I do. I knew Caitlin would be fine between her own abilities, cooking with grandma and lots of people checking in on her if needed but it felt a bit like first day of school again to me which resolved itself in the first 10 seconds of seeing a student's face and hearing their delight to see me back. Caitlin handled the day well, exhausted by midday but rallied after a nap. Her new medicines seem to be helping make things more managable. She was in bed really early but had managed a fairly long day for her. Mark is still fighting his bug and with his fever he is unable to be close which is hard on all of us. Dustin sent an early Valentine's gift which definately brightened Caitlin's afternoon and evening.

February 11, 2009

Day 22 - Caitlin and I attempted to go to a local doctor yesterday morning but after waiting in the waiting room alone for more than 40 minutes at 9:15 in the morning we headed home after her color drained from her face and she began feeling really bad. Brought her home to rest for a while and called her surgeon for advise to her pain increasing so much at night. He worked with us on some adjustments and she did have a better night last night much to our relief. The local doctor is very nice but the overbooking of his schedule that created the long wait was more than her body could tolerate. I tried calling back to reschedule after we got home but after being on hold 15 minutes (it seemed liked forever) I decided that it was just not meant to be for her to be seen locally. After a long rest Caitlin began trying out her musical skills. Piano is a bit easier at the moment mainly because it does not require the extra breath support her flute needs but she enjoyed doing both. Bit by bit she is trying to resume what is normal.

February 10, 2009

Day 21 - Caitlin was up and about walking laps in the house yesterday morning which was encouraging to all of us. Took a short nap after a long night and then up again when Dustin called to give her the news. They got word that they will be getting base housing when they arrive after the wedding which brought a great big smile to her face. She hopes to see the house soon either in person or if possible by picture phone before she goes to visit. She made it out of the house for a while last night to verbally coach her dancers which was really exciting for all of us to see. By evening's end she was totally wiped out but had made big gains in a short period of time. Off to an appointment today and hopefully more walking and resting. We are in high hopes that they can figure out how to help her make it through the nights better. She begins each day so exhausted it amazes her dad and I how much she is accomplishing.

February 9, 2009

Day 20 - I've come to the conclusion that nights are just going to be tough for a while or at least until she can break this break through pain cycle. Caitlin's day yesterday started rough but by midday she was feeling strong enough to take a short walk on campus. It was nice to see her up and walking into almost the middle part of campus before walking back to the car. Her incision is doing well although she had one spot that decided to surprise us and start bleeding but just like when she was little a bandaid and a little TLC. At somepoint we hope to meet the two people who stopped that day and played a critical part in keeping Caitlin with us. They are unsung heroes for being there.

February 8, 2009

Day 19 - After a long restless night we had a quiet day at home yesterday which was great. We did venture out for a drive to enjoy the beautiful sunny sky. Caitlin is trying so hard to bounce back as quick as possible. The looming flu bug in town is frustrating since she can't be around lots of germs after all her body has been through which keeps her from church and other areas that are fairly well populated. Unfortunately, her dad woke up sick this morning so he is off in one part of the house and she and I are staying in another part of the house. Her right side, the area around her liver, is still giving her fits but we are assuming with time and all of her walking things will calm themselves down. We tease her that her patience was taken during surgery since she wants everything better now, not tomorrow or next week. She visited with a few family members by phone, facebooked some friends, and at one point even got up and played the piano for a while to unwind. We appreciate everyone's patience and prayers. We think heaven has been bombarded but we are so thankful they are listening.

February 7, 2009

There is no place like home!!!

Day 18 - We headed to the cardio-specialist yesterday and had some interesting but nicely surprising twists when we asked for his professional opinion. He said while Caitlin has PFO (hole in the heart) more often than not it is the better medical advise to look to other simpler options for it rather than surgery since the surgery itself carries multiple risks we are not sure we want to consider taking. When you look at Caitlin and realize what a miracle it is she survived and what a miracle it is God was there to black it out of her memory - we aren't sure we want to take any risks with her health and neither is she. The cardiologist spent a great deal of time discussing Caitlin's health history in detail with her and said that there are some things to check out based on her history and will be running tests to determine the best option especially in regards to her syncopy and PFO. He also explained that in these situations they can only confirm the specific problem about 10% of the time but the tests will rule out life threatening problems which is definately a plus and hopefully guide us to the best option for her care. Caitlin really felt comfortable with him and really likes the possibility of looking at non-surgical options for controlling her health situation. We headed home after a light lunch and she quickly fell asleep from exhaustion. They told us at dismissal she would be doing a lot of sleeping especially this first week and as glad as we are to have her home with us we respect her need to sleep and will catch up on things later.

February 6, 2009

Day 17 - Caitlin's day went well yesterday and she was actually able to eat some breakfast and lunch before the nausea hit at suppertime. Dr. Long her surgeon is as protective as a father bear and visited with us at length about precautions to ensure a speedy recovery for Caitlin before sending her home. She is feeling overwhelmed by everyone's kindness and concern and then in the mail Thursday afternoon came the most incredible gift from Mark's cousin Julie and her youth group and fellow church members. She had told Caitlin a week ago that they were praying for her along with countless others and that in itself was a tremendous gift. Then in Julie's package was a beautifully knitted bed blanket/prayer shawl. As you can see by the picture Caitlin promptly wrapped up in it as she read the materials Julie enclosed. The knitters of The First Church of Christ in Bedford, Massachusetts enclosed a card that read: "May this gift knit for you with love be a mantle and sign of God's healing presence. May it warm you when weary. May it surround you with ease in your suffering. May it encircle you iwth caring when you are in pain. May it comfort you when you feel alone. May it remind you of God's abiding love. Amen" A wonderful gift with a tremendous message at a perfect time. Thank you to Julie, her youth group and the members of the First Church of Christ and all those who continue to prayer for Caitlin and her loved ones through this journey. You are truly remarkable.

February 5, 2009

Day 16 - Caitlin's day went fairly well yesterday. She did have one moment she started to turn backwards but it turned around by the end of the afternoon. With God on our side her doctor said she should be home by the end of the week. And yes we did a happy dance. The sheer enormity (if that is a word) overwhelms her at times and we let her talk about what has happened when she wants and respect her right to process all of this in her time without our proding and asking questions. We have been so thankful to her visitors that they have respected her right to process all of this without asking her about it as well. We choose to focus on the positive - that she is here, healing, and getting married to a wonderful guy. Caitlin is ready to be back in Maryville and begin healing at her own pace at home.

Carry On At times when you feel troubled When your happiness is gone Look to the heart within youf or the strength to carry on.In your heart you will find special virtues Such as faith and hope and love.These gifts have been sent down to you from a power up above.It is faith that keeps the soul searching for the joy the heart hopes for.It is love that heals the spirit making it stronger than before.And if your heart be broken if your strength should fade away the power of these virtues will still win out the day.So remember when you’re troubled when your happiness is gone look to the heart within you for the strength to carry on. © 2000 Tom Krause.

February 4, 2009

Happy Birthday "Momma C" - Aunt Cynthia

Day 15 - We think the light might have been turned on at the end of this tunnel. Caitlin's day yesterday continued to improve overall for the majority of the day and she had a comparatively uneventful night for the first time since I am not sure when which gave her lots of rest. The nutrients through her pik line are apparently helping her to start regaining some strength and spunk as they are working to rebalance her system. The internal abdominal swelling is improving which is beginning to show signs of relieving some of her abdominal problems. We were all thrilled last night to finally have the bench mark of two good days in a row and then she will be released. While this is a great hospital with a great staff and we would not trade Dr. Long for the world but Dorothy put it best, "There's no place like home."

The Heart Of The Strong

Strong is the heart that knows not the way of comfort and ease while living each day. Yet continues to believe from the depths of its soul that the future is destined to silver and gold. Strong is the heart whose yearning is waned by storms in a life filled with heartache and pain. Yet still gives its all - everything that it can in search of a dream - God’s ultimate plan.When there is victory - when battles are won when burdens are lifted and bright shines the sun - when struggling souls gather - where heroes belong -they find in themselves - the heart of the strong.

February 3, 2009 - Happy Birthday Christopher

Happy Birthday Christopher!!!!!!!
Jill & Christopher; Dustin & Caitlin - Christmas Eve 2008 and Grandma & Grandpa Kinmans

This was the morning after Christopher proposed to Jill. Handsome group!!!

Day 14 - Happy Birthday Bubby!!!! Today is Christopher's 24th birthday. Happy Birthday Christopher or as Caitlin used to say "Tis Ti Fer." Strange to think that in 1985 I was at the hospital bringing Christopher into this world realizing what a miracle that he is and now 24 years later I am in a hospital room looking at another one of God's miracles as Caitlin lays here resting and healing. The sheer magnitude of all of this demonstrates yet again just how amazing God is in our lives.

She spent the night attached to various IV bags that fed her Magnesium sulfate, intralipids, and clinimax (amino acids with electrolytes in dextrose with calcium). Not sure what else but those were the labels I was able to note.

Caitlin is starting to feel somewhat better yesterday. The swelling is still in her abdomin but she is finding relief in the medicines and body's power to help itself. Her proteins, lipids, etc were low so with the addition of today's pik line came nutrients in bags. The hope is these nutrients will strengthen her physical body allowing it an easier path to the healing process. She is still fighting being sick 90% of the day with abdominal pain to rival the nausea but her spirits remain high especially since her medicines today seemed to control the majority of her physical problems. Her night was long as she adjusted to everything but when she slept she slept well.

February 2, 2009

Day 13 - Caitlin is still at Heartland Hospital. She continued getting sicker as the weekend progressed. Her tests last night came back "markedly abnormal" having found the barium in her system (from last Tuesday's CT), large and small intestines inflamed among other things. Her doctor said that it is either a blockage from the accident or an inflamed pancreas from the accident. Since she started vomitting bile he has ordered a pik line go in this morning allowing the team to access her blood easier to make monitoring it more accessible (since her hemoglobin is still low among other stuff this is a good thing) and also allow them the ability to add a feeding line since Caitlin is unable to keep anything down. Definately a blow since she had been progressing and hopes were to be home by now but at the same time glad we were here when she got so sick. Her surgeon said the focus for now is not on getting released but on getting well. We agree with him. He is very good and shows definate concern for her which is comforting. Everyone anticipates her back to normal once she turns the corner but for the time being the corner has a sharper turn. When her body is calm, her spirits remain good. She talks about Dustin, their life together, and the goals they have set as a couple.

February 1, 2009

Day 12 - Very long night last night. Caitlin ended up sicker than I can ever remember her being but she held tough. Still have not heard results from last night's scan so anxious to hear. By nights end Caitlin had hit the point it was bile coming up and her color had become ashen in spite of being put back on an IV. This morning around 7ish a positive glimmer of sunshine started to reappear and she is feeling somewhat better as I write this. We are in high hopes this is the corner she has been waiting to turn and her body is finally letting her peak around that corner. God works in mysterious ways. One of the employees who we have never seen before popped in to the room to take care of something and as we were talking discovered she and Caitlin have similar diagnosis. The employee has been treated successfully for a number of years and it was so comforting to talk to someone face to face who has been through it and can talk about it from a personal aspect. Caitlin is resting comfortably for the first time in a day or two which we are grateful for. Also grateful to everyone who has been there for us in thought and prayer.